Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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