Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
