CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
