why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize