and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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