I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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