I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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