Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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