Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
How external is "for external use only"?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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