People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize