on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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