i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
a search helicopter?!
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
