Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Randomize
