I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
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