My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
