kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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