I just saw a hot homeless man
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
