Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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