So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I am naked and annoyed.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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