we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
