i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
It's not a walk of shame if you run
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
