he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
