i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
well you can't waste a boner
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
