New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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