i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Randomize
