I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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