If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize