Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize