how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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