Whod you bang
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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