sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
