Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
