Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
