You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
