I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
