So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
