you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
