yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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