I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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