The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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