I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
