you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
