u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
