YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
