we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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