this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
