the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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