it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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