C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
