what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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