and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
